What If... the Silver Surfer Lost the Power Cosmic?

You know what's nice about Silver Surfer What Ifs? I can always substitute Rom Spaceknight in the story. Cuz we're never going to get a Rom What If? and I do still miss the big silver lug. Of course, I'd have to file off the numbers for it to work, but angst and lost love and all that are the same, so it basically works.

Sorry about that, just waxing nostalgic about Spaceknight Saturdays, dreaming of a world where Rom's license isn't lost in limbo...

What If Vol.1 #37 (February 1983)
Based on: Fantastic Four #50
The true history: The Silver Surfer sides with the Fantastic Four against Galactus and as punishment, the Devourer of Worlds exiles the Surfer on Earth.
Turning point: What if Galactus punished the Silver Surfer by turning him back into Norrin Radd?
Story type: Momentary difference
Watcher's mood: Dead-eyed giant
Altered history: Galactus gives his punishment a little more thought and not only does he exile the Surfer on Earth, he takes away his powers as well. Probably safer that way, don't you think? If you thought the Surfer was angsty, wait 'til you see him as Norrin Radd.
But the Watcher, known for breaking his oath when it comes to Galactus eating his assignment and things related to that, invites the FF and Norrin to his city on the moon where they might find something to help. Because even with Pogo Plane technology, Reed Richards can't get Norrin back to his love Shalla Bal on Zenn-La. Without the Power Cosmic, Norrin's lost his unerring sense of space direction! On the moon, the Watcher lets them have ONE piece of equipment, but doesn't help by, you know, labeling anything. It's hopeless, right?
Norrin doesn't count on Reed Richard's badass mind, however. Dude goes up to Kirby-Tech and inherently knows that it's a big space compass/space sled. And off Norrin goes, back to Zenn-La! What he doesn't know is that when he broke his deal with Galactus, the Big Hungry Guy went right back to that planet for some eats. There he meets Shalla Bal who is pretty sad to find that Norrin is no longer herald.
She thinks up a plan to get herself nominated herald in his place, and to later run from Galactus once she finds out where her Norri-poo is. Not the smartest move seeing as Galactus just told her he could read her thoughts. He goes for it anyway, and along with a liberal dose of brainwashing and a truly awful codename, he gives her the Power Cosmic (so powerful it inverts epithets).
While coming home, Norrin crosses paths with Starglow and realizes she's Shalla Bal, but she doesn't remember a damn thing. Not her name, not him, only her catering mission. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
He goes back to Galactus and begs him to release her, but he'll have none of it. Those contracts are a little more long term than that. But Galactus apparently respects the Love and decides to give Norrin a consolation prize. He gives him back the Power Cosmic and sends him to defend Earth, unable to leave our planet to interfere with his Galactic Pub Crawl. So... Even Steven.
Books canceled as a result: None. You hear me? NONE!
These things happen: Surfer's lost his Power Cosmic a couple times (such as when Dr. Doom stole it), but never more than temporarily.

Next week: What if Thor Battled Conan?
My guess: Cimmerian stew.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's just me, or Galactus is a little small?

I bet that Norrin Radd is even worst than Manga Khan.

Roger

Siskoid said...

He hadn't eaten in a while.

 

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