Batman and the Outsiders #8 - Pages 22-23

Are you about ready for this issue to END? I am! And with Tannarak turned to dust and all the kiddies de-aged back to normal, what can be left except an epilogue, perhaps with a cheesy Christmas "message"? But wait..."GET OUT!!! GET OUT OF HEEEEERE!!!" (Ooops, sorry, Star Trek III flashback.)
Another baby?! Will he ALSO be Tannarak, or perhaps Tannarak's even more evil twin? Better handle the birthing mother like she's radioactive sludge! Put your lead gloves on! Cue some intense waiting action!
Do you know how many crimes have been committed in Gotham while Batman and the Outsiders wait around for a baby to be born? Dozens (in post-Flushpoint compressed timeline, HUNDREDS). At least now Katana can read an issue of Cosmo cover-to-cover and maybe find herself a MAN. And after an indeterminate amount of time...
Batman and the Phantom Stranger smile at the sound of babies crying. These guys are SCREWED. UP. So Carol's second baby is born, but is it friend or foe?
An exact twin... except for the goatee and magic powers, presumably. Oh naive 1980s... that doctor just admitted to malpractice. That would NEVER happen today. Watch those premiums go up, doc! You may indeed have "bet your practice". But no one's gonna remember this day, apparently...
Awkward and inappropriate touching aside, what is the purpose of having everyone but the heroes forget these events? Will Mrs. Whitfield still have a shiner? Will Lt. Freeman wonder why his open cases haven't been touched? Will the Dennisons wonder how they got to the hospital? This has got to be the most gratuitous use of the "Zatanna gambit" ever. Hey, maybe the Stranger just doesn't want anyone's Christmas to be ruined by pesky memories. It also means that though the Outsiders just fought a "name" villain, no one's gonna remember. Mike Barr is really adverse to having them build their reputation, isn't he? Also, to revealing ANYTHING about Halo's origin.
In this shot, Katana is way taller than Metamorpho. Discuss. Oh, and cue cheesy Christmas message:
"Help" is the operative word here, Rex. The babies were actually saved when the Phantom Stranger - on the case since before any of you - destroyed Tannarak. The Powers That Be gave Carol a second baby to "balance the scales". All the Outsiders did was deal with a distraction (rabid babies), and in the case of Geo-Force, actually bring the pregnant woman compatible with Tannarak's essence to the Children's Hospital where that essence lay in wait. And all this despite your "personal problems", boo-hoo, hero.

Speaking of better Christmas presents, that's just about when I'm due to over-critically analyze B&TO #9 and that "Halo solo story" (because no one demanded it!). See you then!

5 comments:

SallyP said...

Man, the Phantom Stranger just ROCKS that whole turtleneck and medallion look.

Siskoid said...

He is the Mystical Disco King!

And is played by Steve McQueen. I've never imagined him as anyone else.

Matthew Turnage said...

Around Christmas for the next installment? I have not yet gotten around to getting Batman and the Outsiders #s 9 & 10 - I'll have to make sure I keep an eye out for them between now and then.

Siskoid said...

You make my intellectual laziness make sense.

Austin Gorton said...

An exact twin... except for the goatee and magic powers, presumably.

Nope, he said "exact". It's just a good goatee and magic powers, apparently.

All the Outsiders did was deal with a distraction (rabid babies), and in the case of Geo-Force, actually bring the pregnant woman compatible with Tannarak's essence to the Children's Hospital where that essence lay in wait.

Honestly, I think the best part of this issue is that the Outsiders are, at best, guest stars and at worst, villainous accomplices in their own book.

that "Halo solo story" (because no one demanded it!)

A Halo solo story?!? That's the best Christmas gift ever! :)

 

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