Part 5 of my "live blogging" exercise about The Masters of the Universe live action film from where we left off Friday after the first hour.
So let's see... oh yeah, attack on the music store, guitars flying, Man-at-Arms throwing grenades, Detective Lubic asking all the wrong questions, and Teela giving Kevin a gun before throwing herself into the fray. She rocks. She's "Woman-at-Arms".
Aww, 80s girl power! In the back room, Lubic is all "gimme the gun kid", asking like he wants a fix of heroin, but neither Kevin nor Julie are giving anything up. Then Julie sees something in the alley behind the shop. It's her dead mom going "Shhhhh!"
While her boyfriend struggles with Lubic for the gun, she goes out to talk to her mom. Do you smell a sorceress trap? Because this is classic evil sorceress stuff. Hugs? "We've been doing secret work and had to disappear"? A sensible sweater? None of that rings true Julie! Especially not the part about their secret work needing the Cosmic Key! Come on! Don't give it to her!
Awww damn, girl! Now look what you've done. No, really LOOK.
Yeah, feels pretty bad, doesn't it?
The heroes run off after Evil-Lyn's forces as Charlie is forces to look at his destroyed store, handing over his shotgun to Detective "Gimme the gun, gimme the gun, GIMME THE GUN" Lubic.
Within seconds, Lubic almost gets his fool head shot off and THAT'S why he never got an action figure of his own. Truth!
I guess having a car explode that close to you warrants the first use of a curse word in the movie. "Listen Mom! He-Man learned a new word today!"
Evil-Lyn sends a signal to Skeletor and they create the mother of all Boom Tubes to let all the Para-Demons on Earth.
Some of them even have aero-discs!
And of course, there's Skeletor on his open shell death barge!
The Air Centurians [sic] go after He-Man, who blows one of them up outright! It's a risk when your armor is full of back-up fuel for your energy-inefficient flying platform. He commandeers the other one for his own use and makes a run at Evil-Lyn.
Even grapples her Cosmic Key away, yee-haw! While another Centurian tries to draw him to Skeletor, the lich-king has found his own entertainment, rising from behind the other heroes (and, uhm, Kevin and Julie)...
He has no trouble taking Man-at-Arms and Teela's fire with his groovy forcefield, and as the Darth Vader army closes in, the good guys disarm. Knowing Man-at-Arms, it probably takes a while. Actually, it takes so long, he doesn't have time to drop the sword on his back before they're rushed.
As He-Man arrives, Julie gets in the crossfire to let him know it's a trap, and gets a good, pink, lightning zap for her trouble, while He-Man still takes a dive! He goes a little crazy and starts cutting soldiers up.
Though he can clearly beat the whole lot of them single-handedly, Skeletor still gives him an ultimatum: To return to Eternia as his slave, or else die with his friends here, on this primitive and tasteless planet. TASTELESS? Dude, a mirror, please. (Then again, it WAS the 80s.)
I don't know how expects to back up that threat, but I guess we'll find out... tomorrow! Same He-Time, same He-Channel!
So let's see... oh yeah, attack on the music store, guitars flying, Man-at-Arms throwing grenades, Detective Lubic asking all the wrong questions, and Teela giving Kevin a gun before throwing herself into the fray. She rocks. She's "Woman-at-Arms".
Aww, 80s girl power! In the back room, Lubic is all "gimme the gun kid", asking like he wants a fix of heroin, but neither Kevin nor Julie are giving anything up. Then Julie sees something in the alley behind the shop. It's her dead mom going "Shhhhh!"
While her boyfriend struggles with Lubic for the gun, she goes out to talk to her mom. Do you smell a sorceress trap? Because this is classic evil sorceress stuff. Hugs? "We've been doing secret work and had to disappear"? A sensible sweater? None of that rings true Julie! Especially not the part about their secret work needing the Cosmic Key! Come on! Don't give it to her!
Awww damn, girl! Now look what you've done. No, really LOOK.
Yeah, feels pretty bad, doesn't it?The heroes run off after Evil-Lyn's forces as Charlie is forces to look at his destroyed store, handing over his shotgun to Detective "Gimme the gun, gimme the gun, GIMME THE GUN" Lubic.
Within seconds, Lubic almost gets his fool head shot off and THAT'S why he never got an action figure of his own. Truth!
I guess having a car explode that close to you warrants the first use of a curse word in the movie. "Listen Mom! He-Man learned a new word today!"Evil-Lyn sends a signal to Skeletor and they create the mother of all Boom Tubes to let all the Para-Demons on Earth.
Some of them even have aero-discs!
And of course, there's Skeletor on his open shell death barge!
The Air Centurians [sic] go after He-Man, who blows one of them up outright! It's a risk when your armor is full of back-up fuel for your energy-inefficient flying platform. He commandeers the other one for his own use and makes a run at Evil-Lyn.
Even grapples her Cosmic Key away, yee-haw! While another Centurian tries to draw him to Skeletor, the lich-king has found his own entertainment, rising from behind the other heroes (and, uhm, Kevin and Julie)...
He has no trouble taking Man-at-Arms and Teela's fire with his groovy forcefield, and as the Darth Vader army closes in, the good guys disarm. Knowing Man-at-Arms, it probably takes a while. Actually, it takes so long, he doesn't have time to drop the sword on his back before they're rushed.As He-Man arrives, Julie gets in the crossfire to let him know it's a trap, and gets a good, pink, lightning zap for her trouble, while He-Man still takes a dive! He goes a little crazy and starts cutting soldiers up.
Though he can clearly beat the whole lot of them single-handedly, Skeletor still gives him an ultimatum: To return to Eternia as his slave, or else die with his friends here, on this primitive and tasteless planet. TASTELESS? Dude, a mirror, please. (Then again, it WAS the 80s.)I don't know how expects to back up that threat, but I guess we'll find out... tomorrow! Same He-Time, same He-Channel!
Comments
Man, the idea of flying hoverboard type thing was endlessly fascinating to me as a kid.
I'd say I pretended my skateboard was one, but I was never cool enough to pull off skateboarding.
Lack of sports skills is why I went into geekery!
The saving grace: Langella's Skeletor is actually pretty awesome.