Part 3 of my "live blogging" of The Masters of the Universe live action film from where I left off yesterday around 0:29:00.
Before we start, I've had multiple requests for one particular image. Let it never be said that I don't listen to my constituents.
Evil-Lyn as played by Meg Foster. I'll give you a moment.
Back with me? Alright. Back on Earth, Julie wants some time alone in the school gymnatorium, seeing as she's not even sticking around for graduation (the worst date of all time continues!), which'll give Kevin the opportunity to show his friend Charlie the Cosmic Synthesizer he's found. She looks at pictures of her dead parents in a locket and then hears a strange noise.
It's Skeletor's mercs, coming through a Boom Tube. What they'll make of our culture based on their arrival coordinates, I can only guess.
They beat up the janitor, and then start firing at famous landmarks. Julie runs, Beastman gets caught in tinsel...
...and gets ammonia thrown in his eyes as well. That Julie can handle herself. She'll be fine, out in Jersey. She escapes, even from Blade's blades. No word yet on whether prom is ruined.
Probably, though. He-Man hears her cries for help, as she runs through the junkyard/industrial park adjacent her school. She runs right into He-Man, who says he'll "take care of it".
Sorry Kevin.
There's a big fight, which somehow made me wonder if the film isn't a metaphor for the how heavy metal showed up in 1987 to kick synth-pop's ass. Guns & Roses are... Masters of the Universe!
Speaking of which, Kevin shows up at Charlie's (all businesses on Earth have their owner's name), a guitar store, with his Cosmic Synth.
Charlie doesn't know what it is either, but he's got a giant Radioshack police scanner that tells him Central High School (principal's name: Mr. Central) is on fire. "Julie's in there!" WORST. DATE. EVAAARRRRR.
And on the subject of bad dates, He-Man is telling the entire plot of his movie to Julie.
And off they go to get the Key from Kevin, who's clearly in great danger. Not from the mercs, of course - they can't even grab a teenage girl - but from the cops who suspect hormone-fueled, loud-music-inspired arson! The hard-assed cop takes him for a ride, maybe to find his girlfriend, maybe to rough him up with a telephone book. Who knows.
Meanwhile, Teela and her dad meet up with He-Man and Julie for some old-time jealousy. (Girls, behave. He-Man is clearly a sexless being. And I had the action figure, I should know.) The only missing piece is Gwildor, and he arrives in a pink vintage car, heavily modified to run on neutrinos.
Dwarf works FAST.
And now... a creepy romantic scene:
The mercs choose this intimate time to return to Grayskull and completely ruin the mood with their news of failure. Skeletor can forgive failure, but not screwing with his bedroom mojo!
He disintegrates Saurod and the other fall a-begging. Hey, he's "not in the giving vein" (full points to Skeletor for knowing his Richard III - you should really read Shakespeare in the original Eternian). Evil-Lyn intercedes and gets sent to Earth with the mercs. "I wasn't suggesting I go." "Then you should not have spoken." Cold, dude. But I guess you are some kind of undead lich king.
Langella is really proving to be the film's MVP (no surprise). Let's leave off 'til tomorrow while things are awesome.
Before we start, I've had multiple requests for one particular image. Let it never be said that I don't listen to my constituents.
Evil-Lyn as played by Meg Foster. I'll give you a moment.Back with me? Alright. Back on Earth, Julie wants some time alone in the school gymnatorium, seeing as she's not even sticking around for graduation (the worst date of all time continues!), which'll give Kevin the opportunity to show his friend Charlie the Cosmic Synthesizer he's found. She looks at pictures of her dead parents in a locket and then hears a strange noise.
It's Skeletor's mercs, coming through a Boom Tube. What they'll make of our culture based on their arrival coordinates, I can only guess.They beat up the janitor, and then start firing at famous landmarks. Julie runs, Beastman gets caught in tinsel...
...and gets ammonia thrown in his eyes as well. That Julie can handle herself. She'll be fine, out in Jersey. She escapes, even from Blade's blades. No word yet on whether prom is ruined.
Probably, though. He-Man hears her cries for help, as she runs through the junkyard/industrial park adjacent her school. She runs right into He-Man, who says he'll "take care of it".
Sorry Kevin.There's a big fight, which somehow made me wonder if the film isn't a metaphor for the how heavy metal showed up in 1987 to kick synth-pop's ass. Guns & Roses are... Masters of the Universe!
Speaking of which, Kevin shows up at Charlie's (all businesses on Earth have their owner's name), a guitar store, with his Cosmic Synth.
Charlie doesn't know what it is either, but he's got a giant Radioshack police scanner that tells him Central High School (principal's name: Mr. Central) is on fire. "Julie's in there!" WORST. DATE. EVAAARRRRR.And on the subject of bad dates, He-Man is telling the entire plot of his movie to Julie.
And off they go to get the Key from Kevin, who's clearly in great danger. Not from the mercs, of course - they can't even grab a teenage girl - but from the cops who suspect hormone-fueled, loud-music-inspired arson! The hard-assed cop takes him for a ride, maybe to find his girlfriend, maybe to rough him up with a telephone book. Who knows.Meanwhile, Teela and her dad meet up with He-Man and Julie for some old-time jealousy. (Girls, behave. He-Man is clearly a sexless being. And I had the action figure, I should know.) The only missing piece is Gwildor, and he arrives in a pink vintage car, heavily modified to run on neutrinos.
Dwarf works FAST.And now... a creepy romantic scene:
The mercs choose this intimate time to return to Grayskull and completely ruin the mood with their news of failure. Skeletor can forgive failure, but not screwing with his bedroom mojo!
He disintegrates Saurod and the other fall a-begging. Hey, he's "not in the giving vein" (full points to Skeletor for knowing his Richard III - you should really read Shakespeare in the original Eternian). Evil-Lyn intercedes and gets sent to Earth with the mercs. "I wasn't suggesting I go." "Then you should not have spoken." Cold, dude. But I guess you are some kind of undead lich king.Langella is really proving to be the film's MVP (no surprise). Let's leave off 'til tomorrow while things are awesome.
Comments
When I was a kid, that sequence scared the beejesus out of me, despite the fact that the mercs are pretty hapless.
He-Man hears her cries for help, as she runs through the junkyard/industrial park adjacent her school.
The sheer absurdity of having an enormous industrial park school-adjacent also never occurred to me until I was older...
He-Man is telling the entire plot of his movie to Julie.
Just in case anyone nodded off.
The hard-assed cop takes him for a ride
Lubic! I love that guy. He was also Strickland in the Back to the Future films, and had a bit part in Dick Tracy.
Probably because that would have been the COOLEST!
At lease Blade and Saurod got figures when the movie came out.