Who's Granny Goodness?

Who's This? The worst Miss Hannigan.

The facts: Modelled after Phyllis Diller by Jack Kirby, Granny Goodness first appeared in Mister Miracle #2 (May 1971) as a key part of both Scott Free's and Big Barda's origins, and would therefore become one of the most memorable characters in Darkseid's Elite. Not only does she run the Orphanage that trains Apokalips's soldiers, she also controls the Female Furies, her boys and girls growing up indoctrinated thanks to her passive-aggressive tender-loving cruelty. She has scored almost 200 appearances to date.
How you could have heard of her: When the Fourth World makes an appearance, she's usually not far behind, but she is perhaps most memorable to animation fans for her role in the DCAU, voiced by Ed Asner of all people (7 appearances across Superman and JLU). She has also appeared in a season's worth of Young Justice, a couple episodes of Smallville, some DC Super Hero Girls movies, and more.
Example story: Mister Miracle #2 (May-June 1971) "X-Pit" by Jack Kirby, with Vince Colletta
Away from Apokolips, Granny does have a pied-à-terre on Earth, an old mansion that looks like a Kirby science complex inside, manned by armored men. She's keeping tabs on her old pupil, Scott Free, and if he's not going to die in one of his own death traps, she'll just have to take a hand. Don't let the mumu fool you - she's still a warrior!
Her pet student is Overlord, a machine designed to kill (or fail to kill, in Mister Miracle's case), and if you're NOT her pet, you're probably going to get some random whippings.
The soldier-boys are therefore motivated (all sticks, no carrots) to snatch Scott and Oberon so they can be thrown into Overlord's X-Pit. There's no dissension in the ranks. They love their Granny. They live to serve her. And by extinction - Darkseid!
Wear your pointed helmets proudly, you've captured them! But wait! That's not Scott! It's just a dummy he uses to test his traps. The dead eyes say it all, and Granny is not happy. Does she have to do everything herself?! Here comes Mister Miracle to rescue Oberon! Activate the X-Pit!
Don't think she's a monster! She loves her wards! She feels empathy! It's just too bad that when they don't LISTEN, they have to be PUNISHED! To dry her tears, one of her precious soldier boys brings her the wishing machine Darkseid gave her, except...
When her eyes adjust, she finds her soldiers all knocked out and her machine destroyed. Scott Free has escaped and left Overlord for scrap too. But you know what hurts the most? THE DISRESPECT!
And with that, Scott and Oberon are off!

Not the best showing for Granny Goodness - she's perhaps best used in flashbacks to Scott and Barda's school days, or at least interacting with her Furies - but there's always been a nice frisson to her character, running an orphanage through cruelty and abuse. She deserves her status near the top of Darkseid's Elite.

Who's Next? A soldier with terrible duties.

Comments