It's spring and some drivers have already taken their roadsters out of storage for a spin. Showing off the classics, roof rolled down, wind in their hair... Show-offs, one and all. Hope you enjoy those two weeks of Canadian summer before they have to go back into storage. Now me, I don't drive. Not even a driver's license. It's one of my excentricities. But if I WERE a rich driver, I'm pretty sure I'd have a geek car in storage somewhere. But which one? Oh the possibilities...
Batmobile
This is the obvious one. Too obvious. It's had many permutations over the years, but the 60s longbody remains the most iconic. There's room for you and a buddy, a nice red trim on the black finish, and a direct uplink to the 10k Bat-Computer. But you'd get all of Adam West's stalkers.
Voodoo
I don't drive, but I play Grand Theft Auto. A design in the same style as the classic Batmobile is the Voodoo. I could get my Haitian groove on in this classic drag racer. Extra features: Great suspension, fire coming out its exhaust pipe. Unfortunately, it is VERY easy to steal.
Bessie
There's classic and then there's ANTIQUE. The 3rd Doctor's car is deceptively fast thanks to Time Lord technology, but I'd still like something a bit more modern. And don't mention the Whomobile. Really. Don't.
General Lee
I've lived in the Southern United States, but the General Lee calls attention itself a bit much. I don't know if it's the overt reference to defending slavery, the flashy orange color or the silly horn. Extra feature: Can jump over a creek like nobody's business. Unextra feature: Doors welded shut.
K.I.T.T.
If all I care about is turbo boosting over stuff, might as well go with the Knight Industries 2000. It has more personality and a lot more kit (if you'll allow the pun). None of that crappy TV movie KI3000 either. Wow, that sucked.
Christine
I might have mentioned K.A.R.R. instead of K.I.T.T., but as long as I'm exploring more evil possibilities, might as well go with the true classic of evil cars. Isn't Christine a beauty? And just like a girl, she'll crush you. Or gas you. Or run you over. Lovely. But "Bad to the Bone" is the only thing that plays on the radio, and I like a more varied tune selection.
Mike the Stuntman's 1970 Chevy Nova
For something less dangerous to the driver, there's the car from Death Proof. It's fast, it's cool, it's powerful, and it's safe. Well, safe for the driver. Who's the only person I care about really. Cuz the car makes me bad.
Frankenstein's Corvette
I'm a fan of Car Wars, so this would be perfect. Eats up the competition! Of course, the modifications are a bit on the heavy side, but still the best car here to score some major points.
The Love Bug
Ok, maybe I don't want to ride evil wheels. What are my options? Well, if I still want a car with personality, there's ol' Number 53, Herbie (and again, the classic, none of that Lindsay Lohan bollocks). Herbie's like a dating service (so long as the girl has a cute car), but I might not fit in a Beetle. 6'4" and everything...
Village Taxi
Other options I might as well strike off the list right now include the taxi from The Prisoner. It's a glorified golf cart, and you should see my handicap.
Flintstone Family Car
And while this car is a loot roomier than Barney Rubble's Tree Trunk Coupe, I don't think I'd want to suddenly start driving only to be walking. Extra feature: The most eco-friendly car on the list. What's the least?
De Lorean
An atomic-powered sports car that drives through time? Bad for the environment AND the timeline. Sure, its gets cleaner after it goes to the future, but I prefer not to think about Back to the Future, Part II. Still, hard to resist a time travelling car. Bottom line: I just hate the way the doors open.
So I'm down to two choices, completely different.
Torchwood SUV
For maximum amount of kit, this is mini-van of choice. GPS, armored skin, bigger on the inside than on the outside, and computer terminals in the back so the kids can keep quiet while they hack into Pentagon files. I do have to learn to drive on the right side though.
Veronica Mars' LeBaron
Probably a more sensible choice. Sure, it's a used old heap, two-tone even, and I don't have a friend like Weevil to keep it running. Risky, sure. But it's been tried, tested and proven to be non-descript enough to run surveillance on grungy motels. Maybe I was just sorry to see it go after the second season. That Saturn hybrid sure doesn't have the same chic.
"What?" You ask. "No Aston Martin?" Yeah, I know. None of the James Bond cars really do it for me. Except maybe the amphibious one. But what's YOUR sweetest geek ride?
Batmobile
This is the obvious one. Too obvious. It's had many permutations over the years, but the 60s longbody remains the most iconic. There's room for you and a buddy, a nice red trim on the black finish, and a direct uplink to the 10k Bat-Computer. But you'd get all of Adam West's stalkers.Voodoo
I don't drive, but I play Grand Theft Auto. A design in the same style as the classic Batmobile is the Voodoo. I could get my Haitian groove on in this classic drag racer. Extra features: Great suspension, fire coming out its exhaust pipe. Unfortunately, it is VERY easy to steal.Bessie
There's classic and then there's ANTIQUE. The 3rd Doctor's car is deceptively fast thanks to Time Lord technology, but I'd still like something a bit more modern. And don't mention the Whomobile. Really. Don't.General Lee
I've lived in the Southern United States, but the General Lee calls attention itself a bit much. I don't know if it's the overt reference to defending slavery, the flashy orange color or the silly horn. Extra feature: Can jump over a creek like nobody's business. Unextra feature: Doors welded shut.K.I.T.T.
If all I care about is turbo boosting over stuff, might as well go with the Knight Industries 2000. It has more personality and a lot more kit (if you'll allow the pun). None of that crappy TV movie KI3000 either. Wow, that sucked.Christine
I might have mentioned K.A.R.R. instead of K.I.T.T., but as long as I'm exploring more evil possibilities, might as well go with the true classic of evil cars. Isn't Christine a beauty? And just like a girl, she'll crush you. Or gas you. Or run you over. Lovely. But "Bad to the Bone" is the only thing that plays on the radio, and I like a more varied tune selection.Mike the Stuntman's 1970 Chevy Nova
For something less dangerous to the driver, there's the car from Death Proof. It's fast, it's cool, it's powerful, and it's safe. Well, safe for the driver. Who's the only person I care about really. Cuz the car makes me bad.Frankenstein's Corvette
I'm a fan of Car Wars, so this would be perfect. Eats up the competition! Of course, the modifications are a bit on the heavy side, but still the best car here to score some major points.The Love Bug
Ok, maybe I don't want to ride evil wheels. What are my options? Well, if I still want a car with personality, there's ol' Number 53, Herbie (and again, the classic, none of that Lindsay Lohan bollocks). Herbie's like a dating service (so long as the girl has a cute car), but I might not fit in a Beetle. 6'4" and everything...Village Taxi
Other options I might as well strike off the list right now include the taxi from The Prisoner. It's a glorified golf cart, and you should see my handicap.Flintstone Family Car
And while this car is a loot roomier than Barney Rubble's Tree Trunk Coupe, I don't think I'd want to suddenly start driving only to be walking. Extra feature: The most eco-friendly car on the list. What's the least?De Lorean
An atomic-powered sports car that drives through time? Bad for the environment AND the timeline. Sure, its gets cleaner after it goes to the future, but I prefer not to think about Back to the Future, Part II. Still, hard to resist a time travelling car. Bottom line: I just hate the way the doors open.So I'm down to two choices, completely different.
Torchwood SUV
For maximum amount of kit, this is mini-van of choice. GPS, armored skin, bigger on the inside than on the outside, and computer terminals in the back so the kids can keep quiet while they hack into Pentagon files. I do have to learn to drive on the right side though.Veronica Mars' LeBaron
Probably a more sensible choice. Sure, it's a used old heap, two-tone even, and I don't have a friend like Weevil to keep it running. Risky, sure. But it's been tried, tested and proven to be non-descript enough to run surveillance on grungy motels. Maybe I was just sorry to see it go after the second season. That Saturn hybrid sure doesn't have the same chic."What?" You ask. "No Aston Martin?" Yeah, I know. None of the James Bond cars really do it for me. Except maybe the amphibious one. But what's YOUR sweetest geek ride?
Comments
My personal geek-wheels would have to be the Angel-mobile: a black 1967 Plymouth Belvedere GTX convertible. Totally impractical, but looks fantastic. Either that or the flying, time-traveling train from BttF3 (the steam engine means it has to be better for the environment than the DeLorean, no? Though perhaps even WORSE at parking).
Top speed is about thirty miles an hour, but it is JUST so cool.
My second favorite might be Jim Rockford's '77 Pontiac Firebird. I liked it slightly better than the Bandit's version (mostly because James Garner is WAY cooler than Burt Reynolds).
Or maybe one of the vehicles from MASK, that transforms into a different vehicle, with guns.
-61 Hudson Hornet: saw one last summer, same color. Suspention was stock, so too high. I like the road hugger look. I'd have all the racing lettering "Fabulous Hudson Hornet" on the sides.
-The delinquent road hazards: (1) Wingo - nice fluo green and that rad spoiler. IT's a Nissan based design, though you could make one with the Subary WRX (2) Deejay - Too bad Scions are not available in Canada. (3) Snot Rod: Classic Mopar style and side exausts and finally (4) Boost - pimped out celica with huge NOS tanks. All of them are Chip Foose designs I'm sure (he is in the credits)
-Sally. I love the 911, from the 80's to current models too. The 2001 model is nice and the rear spoiler pinstriping is a must. Just not too sure about the baby blue color. Speaking of 911's, how about the black one from the Bad Boys movie?
Other famous movie cars (from my youth):
-The corvette from Corvette Summer.
-The Lamborghini from Cannonball Run
Okay, so my boys are 5 and 6 years old, and are HUGE Cars movie fans.
or Green Arrow's arrow car, due to its phallic subtext.
The Spider-Mobile. Slap on a Spidey mask, drive on some walls, let the Web-Slinger take the blame. He's used to that sort of thing.