
(a) What if Flash Thompson had been bitten by the radioactive spider?
(b) What if Betty Brant had been bitten by the radioactive spider?
(c) What if John Jameson had been bitten by the radioactive spider?
And I'll be using those three ellipsed letters throughout this post to differentiate between the alternate histories.
What If Vol.1 #7 (February 1978)
Based on: Amazing Fantasy #15
The true history: You all know it... Young Peter Parker goes to a science exhibit where a spider gets a powerful dose of radioactivity and then immediately bites him. He gets spidey-powers and so it goes.
Turning point: (a) What if Flash Thompson had followed Peter Parker to the science exhibit? (b) What if J.Jonah Jameson was friends with the scientist conducting the radioactivity experiment? (c) What if astronaut John Jameson once worked with the scientist conducting the experiment?
Story type: Multiple choice.
Watcher's mood: Off the reservation.


(b) JJJ's interest in the science experiment puts his secretary Betty Brant on the scene. She gets bit and almost faints, prompting Peter Parker to take her out for coffee. That's where he notices her budding powers, helps her test them and comes upon a scheme to turn her into a superhero he can take pictures of to generate income for both of them. The Amazing Spider-Girl is born!


(c) JJJ's son gets bitten and they soon notice back at the space program that he's gotten pretty strong. His father convinces him to quite NASA and become a superhero. Armed with a jetpack donated by the space boys, a Daily Bugle-fueled public relations campaign and a costume designed by JJJ, John becomes Spider Jameson!


Not so! Because if the Watcher has a point, it's this. In (a), (b) and (c) alike, Peter managed to give HIMSELF spider-powers using his consolation prize and the inspiration of each false spider-start. And hey, Uncle Ben is even alive in a couple of those worlds.
Books canceled as a result: Well there was little chance of titles named after Captain Spider, Spider Jameson, or even Spider-Girl surviving for very long in the nascent Marvel Universe, so think of them as abortive series - like the original (gray) Hulk - retooled as Spider-Man after no more than a year.
These things happen: While there was a Spider-Girl comic, it's based on a whole other What If. None of these characters ever had the spider-powers, though Flash would have wanted them, and Jameson got others entirely. Flash DID impersonate Spider-Man once, which deserves mention, I suppose.
So what did we learn? That Peter Parker was karmically the best and only choice to be Spider-Man? You're preaching to the choir, new regular writer Don Glut! No, what I really learned was that artist Rick Hoberg is terrible at designing costumes. I've seen better in random Dial H stories!
Comments
I know I'm taking that advice to heart.
Not a bad story more or less.
"Spider-Man" is such a no-brainer that I found it hard to believe that even a tool like Flash Thompson would have come up with "Captain Spider" first.
Only in a world where you're afraid of being sued by Marvel would a guy with spider powers choose anything but "Spider-Man."
I also remember this issue as the one where the "everything ends up the same eventually" What If story subcategory became really obvious to me.
And yet, I don't feel that about the actual Spider-Girl.