Godzilla versus SHIELD

Yes, I've asked Mothra to help me out with my reviewed of Godzilla comics because, well, she knows him personally. What Mothra ISN'T telling you is that this is all part of Here's to the Losers, a blogular event designed to show what weekly posts designed to replace Spaceknight Saturdays would have looked like had What If? not won the popular vote. Godzilla King of Monsters clocked in at 20%.
Yes, yes. Quite right. And perhaps voters didn't realize that in that comic, Godzilla basically FIGHTS THE MARVEL UNIVERSE! And not just the monsters from those pre-Fantastic Four days either. In the first issue, Godzilla attracts the attention of SHIELD.

After terrorizing Japan for, it says here, two decades (how the country ever got down to making DVD players, I'll never know), Godzilla finally comes to America. And this isn't your funny wrestler in a rubber suit with googly eyes Godzilla. This is the Gojira of the very first movie. He's an atomic bomb on legs. And he's come to Alaska to rip out Sarah Palin's favorite pipeline!

Let me read for you what it says in that last panel's caption: "As far as this mammoth monster is concerned, the vampiric thirst of America will just have to wait." Well played, Doug Moench.
Uhm, yes. The Helicarrier comes to the rescue, commanded by Dum Dum Dugan. He unleashes a cadre of guys named after the alphabet and armed with Kirbytech at the God we call Zilla.
Dum Dum's own fighter gets chomped by the King of Monsters, though DD does show himself to be at least as badass as Nick Fury.
Parachuting out of Godzilla's jaws. That's what I call an extreme sport.
Well, you kind of jumped the gun on that one, but I'll forgive you cuz you're so cute! Point is, after all that, who could blame Dum Dum and his best pal Woo for sticking with the series until the end? SOMEbody's got to follow Godzilla around the country! So yeah, readers, you missed out on Mothra hosting this outrageous comics series every week...
Yes, and guest critic Rodan would have popped in from time to time as well. Can you guys stop interrupting now? Where was I? I forget. Anyway. Have a good day. I've got some giant atomic monsters to shoo out of the apartment.


De said...

Please keep this feature waiting in the wings for the future. This would have been great. Thanks a lot, What If people! ;-)

Austin Gorton said...

Come back, Mothra, come back!

SFF said...

What if WHAT IF didn't win! Damn! Godzilla would have been fun. Love the creative Rodan and Mothra touches. Maybe we would have gotten Monster Zero too.

Siskoid said...

I can only say that, yes, I had offers from other monsters to crash the party.

Sea-of-Green said...

Oh, I HAD those Marvel Godzilla comics once! Ohhh, I MISS those old Godzilla comics.

Yes, by all means! Keep this series in the wings -- especially Mothra's and Rodan's wings. ;-)

ShadowWing Tronix said...

Are you people sorry now for not voting for Godzilla? Are you sorry now!

I actually did try for a last minute appeal on my blog, but I don't have a strong enough readership. I also blame Snell for trying to sabotage things. (Hey, it works for Congress.)

cultural vomitorium said...

this is why democracy doesn't work.

snell said...

We could have rocked both. After all, Doug Moench wrote Master Of Kung Fu, Doug Moench wrote Godzilla...goddamn, there's a crossover that should have happened!!


Blog Archive


5 Things to Like Activities Advice Alien Nation Aliens Say the Darndest Things Alpha Flight Amalgam Ambush Bug Animal Man anime Aquaman Archetypes Archie Heroes Arrowed Asterix Atom Avengers Awards Babylon 5 Batman Battle Shovel Battlestar Galactica Black Canary BnB 2-in1 Books Booster Gold Buffy Canada Captain America Captain Marvel Cat CCGs Charlton Circles of Hell Class Comics Comics Code Approved Conan Contest Cooking Crisis Daredevil Dating Kara Zor-El Dating Lois Lane Dating Lucy Lane Dating Princess Diana DCAU Deadman Dial H Dice Dinosaur Island Dinosaurs Director Profiles Doctor Who Doom Patrol Down the Rabbit Hole Dr. Strange Encyclopedia Fantastic Four Fashion Nightmares Fiasco Films Within Films Flash Flushpoint Foldees French Friday Night Fights Fun with Covers FW Team-Up Galleries Game design Gaming Geekly roundup Geeks Anonymous Geekwear Gimme That Star Trek Godzilla Golden Age Grant Morrison Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction Green Arrow Green Lantern Hawkman Hero Points Podcast Holidays House of Mystery Hulk Human Target Improv Inspiration Intersect Invasion Invasion Podcast Iron Man Jack Kirby Jimmy Olsen JLA JSA Judge Dredd K9 the Series Kirby Motivationals Krypto Kung Fu Learning to Fly Legion Letters pages Liveblog Lonely Hearts Podcast Lord of the Rings Machine Man Motivationals Man-Thing Marquee Masters of the Universe Memes Memorable Moments Metal Men Metamorpho Micronauts Millennium Mini-Comics Monday Morning Macking Movies Mr. Terrific Music Nelvana of the Northern Lights Nightmare Fuel Number Ones Obituaries oHOTmu OR NOT? Old52 One Panel Outsiders Panels from Sheena Paper Dolls Play Podcast Polls Questionable Fridays Radio Rants Reaganocomics Recollected Red Bee Red Tornado Reign Retro-Comics Reviews Rom RPGs Sandman Sapphire & Steel Sarah Jane Adventures Saturday Morning Cartoons SBG for Girls Seasons of DWAITAS Secret Origins Podcast Secret Wars SF Shut Up Star Boy Silver Age Siskoid as Editor Siskoid's Mailbox Space 1999 Spectre Spider-Man Spring Cleaning ST non-fiction ST novels: DS9 ST novels: S.C.E. ST novels: The Shat ST novels: TNG ST novels: TOS Star Trek Streaky Suicide Squad Supergirl Superman Supershill Swamp Thing Tales from Earth-Prime Team Horrible Teen Titans That Franchise I Never Talk About The Orville The Prisoner The Thing Then and Now Theory Thor Thursdays of Two Worlds Time Capsule Timeslip Tintin Torchwood Tourist Traps of the Forgotten Realms Toys Turnarounds TV V Waking Life Warehouse 13 Websites What If? Who's This? Whoniverse-B Wikileaked Wonder Woman X-Files X-Men Zero Hour Strikes Zine