December is upon us, and if there's one thing I think is crap, it's the Holiday Season(TM). And if there's another thing I think is crap, it's Batman and the Outsiders. So let's flip the bird to both by 1) examining the series' first Annual in excruciatingly critical detail, and 2) doing this special 4th of July story during the build-up to CHRISTMAS. By no means am I staging one of those attacks on Christmas we hear so much about on FOX News, but Conservatives may still find a lot to offend them in this Mike Barr story. Hey, it's right there on the cover. A burning U.S. flag. Mike Barr is a pinko hippie, clearly.
-The secret origin and meaning of Geo-Force's new, extra-garish costume!
-The introduction of America's last line of defense against liberal fascism: The Force of July! (They do 4th of July puns too)
-The Outsiders get owned and then prevail! (Yes, I realize this is the plot to every single Outsiders storyline to date)
-Conservative so evil, 1984's kids probably all asked their parents if they could get a membership in the Democratic Party for Christmas!
-95% less Batman! (Oh Lord.)
-Halo's dating woes! (Oh Looooorrrrrrrrdd.)
Set the wayback machine to 1984, I'm going to be unfairly critical, but I promise not to use any that Newspeak the kids like to use these days. It'll be doubleplusfun!