Krypto #36: Dead Man's Dog

From: Superman #149, Superman's Girl Friend, Lois Lane #29 (November 1961)

Cover-date November 1961 brought us two stories in which Superman might have met his end, leaving us to wonder what his pet dog would do without a master. In the first, "The Death of Superman!" presents an imaginary story in which Luthor repents, cures cancer and starts helping Superman. Feeling betrayed, Metropolis' criminal underworld vows to kill Luthor unless he kills Superman. But though Superman saves his life a number of times, they really didn't have to force him to do the dirty deed. It was his plan all along, and was juts lulling Superman into a false sense of security until he could spring a kryptonite trap on him. Superman dies. Krypto is sad.
So how does he become Supergirl's dog? The world doesn't even know about her! She's Superman's secret weapon... for just such a contingency! Hey world, SECRET NO LONGER!
She would have stopped Luthor much sooner if she didn't need to make that disguise... Anyway, it's off to Kandor for Lex and a banishment to the Phantom Zone. Supergirl takes over Superman's patrol, with her trusty pet in tow. (Sorry Streaky, you're a nice pet, but you're not exactly "trusty".)
Meanwhile, in the actual DC Universe, in the famous "Lois Lane kisses all the other heroes" story, in fact, Krypto helps Superman narrowly avoid Green K death by... wait for it... drawing a smoke "L" in the sky that triggers a series of actions that includes Lois writing a puff piece about how superheroes kiss, including Green Arrow, Aquaman and Batman.
At an important point in the story, Arthur and Olie give Batman handkerchiefs dirty with Lois' lipstick, and he uses the Bat-Plane to drop them on a disabled Superman, in the Arctic, surrounded by aliens and chunks of Green Kryptonite. Superman grabs it eagerly, and just when you think you're going to have to not judge his fetishistic appetites, he wakes up, and defeats the aliens like the Green K ain't no thang. What the--?!
And okay, "Plan L"... uhm...What's that again? Long-form explanation:
Her task is to get a piece of Red K that once saved Krypto from Green K to Superman in the Arctic, which isn't easy for a girl reporter, even one as resourceful as she is. She had to improvise and not show her hand because she knew she was being watched. So she mixed the Red K with lipstick, and invented that whole kissing scheme to get it into Justice Leaguers' hands, even though only Batman had the tools to get it to him, and it's a good thing Superman was dying very very slowly I guess, and there wasn't much wind when Batman threw it down...

Look, it worked, what more do you want? And regardless of what you think of Lois' cleverness, Superman's survival was all thanks to Krypto.

3 comments:

snell said...

Ah, Silver Age DC--when you had to stop the story dead in its track for a page and a half so you could exposition-dump the ridiculously convoluted explanation that justifies the nonsensical events of the previous 10 pages!

Jonathan Linneman said...

Following up on @snell, this entry reminds me of that feeling you get when you read through a Silver Age DC page that seems like just a wall of text compared to today's decompressed stories, and then when you hit the end you think, "Holy crap, THAT's what this was building up to...?"

Jonathan Linneman said...

Oh! And to clarify, I'm not saying the blog post gave me that feeling! That full page at the end just triggered those memories...!

 

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