I told you! We're going to be here a while! Mad went mad over Dial H, and now we're all paying the price!
Case 115: Mad About DC #1
Dial Holders: Who cares?
Dial Type: Watch/Pendant Dial
Dialing: Well, let's try to score a No-Prize, at least. If we're seeing these at all, and given there are both male and female identities, these are possibly Chris & Vicki failures. There is an important gap after New Adventures of Superboy #49, although at that point, you're left thinking that the heroes are inspired by Nick's imagination. Maybe that's why we never hear about Nick, though. He goes bad, only uses the cool identities on HIS Dial (inherited from Robby Reed), and foists these terrible looks on his two school chums. Then again, we may be on Earth-Mad and nothing has anything to do with anything.
Costume: It's like one of Superman's hand-me-downs, with the "S" ripped off,, some red gloves to match the boots, and a purple cape attached to a Hawkeye-like mask. We don't notice much of it because of his long white beard which attracts all the attention. Properly droopy for the concept.
Powers: He can float. He can ONLY float. Maybe not that far off the ground. Maybe his kryptonite is wind gusts, I don't know. But the title and the beard (if not the blank gaze) make me think he's very wise and intelligent, which is where I think he'll be useful. In the background, directing tactics.
Sighted: Floating a foot off the ground.
Possibilities: You almost want him to be a member of the Superman Family, or perhaps an old Superman, from centuries in the future, who’s lost almost all his powers, but remains a mentor to a new generation. But then why would he wear a mask? So set it in the present day, and make him a Professor X of sorts, training young heroes whom he has convinced of his credentials thanks to an old Superman Halloween costume he's found in the trash. He's never actually met the Man of Steel, or done anything, but he'll make you believe it. Turns out, he really has something to contribute (in the smarts department), but his students might feel betrayed once they discover his little white lies.
Integration Quotient: 45% (yes, it's silly, but I just wrote myself a cool storyline for one of those "Academy" books that keep popping up)
Costume: An interesting, key-like, emblem that combines an "I" with an "F", and trades in shades of green and gold (plus white) we don't see a lot of. Traditional open-topped mask with goggle eyes, shoulder pads in addition to a cape. Some flare on gloves and boots (though you can't see one of these part of the time. The kind of thing you'd see in superhero crowd scenes where we're not really supposed to know anyone. It certainly doesn't match a stealth theme.
Powers: He can turn one of his feet (and legs, up to 5 inches from the knee) invisible. He can't really deliver a surprise ass-kicking, because the movement of the rest of the leg would make it obvious. Maybe he could stand on it behind a curtain and lift the other, and hide effectively.
Sighted: Showing off his power. The way he gestures makes it seem like he can turn it on and off.
Possibilities: I can imagine an origin where he dipped his foot in Invisible Kid's serum and got this power. So this is strictly a Legion try-outs type of character and a one-panel joke. I can already imagine Superboy screaming "REJECTED" like he did for Infectious Lass.
Integration Quotient: 5% (the joke would basically be this one, and DC has already done it)
Costume: A red and purple bodysuit not unlike the early Doom Patrol uniforms. The belt has all her initials on the buckle. She has a red domino mask, a silver tiara/crown, and holstered carrots. Of course, the most important thing is that her sleeves are rolled up (rare!) and her hands are inserted into (or ARE, but I don't want to think about that) gray bunny rabbits who may or may not be alive (probably alive unless the carrots are for herself).
Powers: I disagree with the Dial's contention that this power is "Adorably useless". Rabbits can bite pretty hard, giving her "rabbit punches" (oh, I see what they did there) some power. That said, if the rabbits are alive, that makes it very hard for her to do anything else, including efficiently feeding her "hands".
Sighted: Looking at her bunny fists, perhaps wondering what to do with them.
Possibilities: This is a very silly idea and it gets sillier the more you think about it. What happened? Some kind of phased/transported matter accident that fused her with her pets? Was she already a superhero? How does she get in and out of costume? We need Graham Chapman to walk in here and put an end to the sketch.
Integration Quotient: 0% (I just can't work my head around it)
Costume: A take on Tarantula's All-Star Squadron costume, but it's a black tick on the chest with red eyes and a green question mark. The goggled mask is more like Blue Beetle, and there's a green-eyed tick painted on it. Green gloves (and probably boots) complete the look.
Powers: He can sense/find ticks, but I don't think it's a power per se. "I think..." speaks to either a non-specific location sense, or to a simple, if highly-specialized, skill. Maybe there are special lenses in his goggles.
Sighted: Spotting a tick in someone's hair.
Possibilities: Most superheroes are "general practitioners" - they'll go after any threat, disaster or villain, at least, in their power range - but there ARE specialists. The latter-day Dr. Mid-Nite seems to only involve herself in medical problems, for example. And then there's the Tick-Finder who patrols woodland areas and saves people from lime disease. You probably pay for the service, unless he's really passionate about it. Not sure why he would need to wear a costume (legitimacy?). Maybe he's also a kickass martial artist. Maybe.
Integration Quotient: 10% (I'm sure these kinds of metas exist, but nobody's giving them their own series)
Costume: A comfortable gray hoody with a purple S and M (uhm...) emblem, and of course, very baggy, animated sweatpants. These are tied with a very long shoelace.
Powers: The sweatpants are animated (including the shoelace belt), can stretch and create shapes. The character's name could suggest that this is a psionic power native to the hero rather than stemming from the pants themselves, but that's entirely too specific.
Sighted: Creating two giant hands doing the peace sign, one from each pant leg.
Possibilities: Movies like The Fabric and Mother Mary have taught me the value of magical fabrics, though in this case, it might be a scientific process. Yes, it's weird, but I could see the character be, like, the most casual superhero ever, making statements against constricting spandex and other uncomfortable fashions with litter our comics. But who would take them seriously?
Integration Quotient: 20% (there's potential, but the name is rather clunky)
Next: Haven't even cleared page 1 yet.
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