"Accomplishments"
In theaters: Backooms kind of takes the frisson of those bunker-raiding and spelunking videos and weaponizes it for horror-adjacent sci-fi, an intriguing premise (and attendant visuals) that lures the audience in much in the same way The Blair Witch Project did (the 90s setting and the video camera sequences evoke that pretty directly), though a more recent found footage touchstone might be As Above, So Below. To me, it looked a lot like Chiwetel Ejiofor and Renate Reinsve accidentally walked into an art gallery (I worked in one for years, and those walls haunt my dreams still). But then, I feel like a connoisseur of creepy anomalous spaces because I've read House of Leaves and the LitenVerse novellas, oh, and the Exit 8 film just came out, too, so Backrooms wasn't entirely a surprise. Like Exit 8, the weird spaces are a reflection of the psyches of those it pulls in (something the characters are always rather slow to realize, or at least, verbalize). But yeah, whatever's in there is just their distorted memories - the psychological "loop" they are trapped in - which eventually translates into a dark (and bizarre) monster for them to escape. Or is this the AI Slop Dimension? Could be that, too. Though it starts out fairly slow, with repetitive "gamist" exploration, it eventually cranks the insanity up to 11. But I think horror fiends may find it lacking until then, while sci-fi heads might think that's when it jumps the tracks. I personally think the mash-up worked.
At home: Gore Verbinski's Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die is Terminator for the 2020s, as Sam Rockwell returns from an A.I. apocalypse to prevent it, 5 minutes from now. The twist is that only the perfect group of people from a specific diner can help him do it, this isn't his first attempt by a long chalk, and there are millions of different combinations. The group he gets includes Michael Peña, Zazie Beetz, Juno Temple and a recent favorite, Haley Lu Richardson. It's through these team members that we discover what fresh hell awaits us - take everything that's wrong with our society today, crank it up, and give it a sci-fi trope to chew on and that's kind of what we're given. Verbinksi could have made four or five different movies (or Dark Mirror episodes) out of Matthew Robinson's script, but I like how wild it is. I don't want to talk too much about the crazy third act because I fear I'd give too much away, including just what I think is going on, but which should be each audience's own evaluation. A lot of fun, sometimes delightfully silly, and stylishly executed.
I would describe Lesbian Space Princess as an adult LGBTQ+ Adventure Time, but even that doesn't really prepare you for this animated sci-fi musical comedy filled with queer Australian talent. We're in Gay-Space and a Sapphic planet's princess who struggles with anxiety and crippling insecurity is having it rough - her hot girlfriend just left her and she can't, for the life of her, manifest the magical axe that a young princess should. But she might find her self-worth racing across the Gaylaxy to save the ex from a hilarious trio of Straight White Maliens - a SAVAGE take-down of incel culture, just side-splitting - if she realizes that's what's at stake. As is perhaps apparent from some of the movie's nomenclature I've thrown into the review, a lot of the humor derives from puns, and that could have easily gone awry. But no, in the end, this was pretty sweet, often irreverent, and chaotic in the best way. A crazy take on the coming of age story, perfect for Pride Month or any other time of the year.
Director Michael Lukk Litwak describes Molli and Max in the Future as When Harry Met Sally a billion years in the future, and hahaha, yeah, that's not a bad description, so long as you also mention the heavy Futurama filter that's been dropped on it. Zosia Mamet and Aristotle Athari are friends who won't pull the trigger on a more intimate relationship - look, she's a space witch and he's a mech fighter, it would never work - who we catch up to at different points in their lives in a crumbling universe (satire!). It's often quite silly, especially at first when the characters are putting up a front that reads as broad sitcom typing, but though it's a mishmash of every sci-fi venture you can think of, and the satire is often wielded like a sledgehammer (the riff on climate change is too obvious, but I like movie's take on elections), it manages to be truthful in the end. Because when its using its sci-fi tropes as metaphors FOR the relationship, that's where it shines best, and yeah, it got me, in the end. ESPECIALLY once I realized, thanks to the credits, that they put the actors in miniature sets rather than all-CG creations. Molli and Max had my smiles, but that's when it got my respect.
Rich in its themes, Bertrand Bonello's The Beast is, ahead of anything else, a great showcase for Léa Seydoux - a film that makes me think I've never appreciated her enough. It's 2044, and A.I. has not only replaced us in most jobs, but if we want to do anything worthwhile, we need to purge our "affects" (traumas, unconscious triggers, etc.) and become more like that A.I. It's a pretty gonzo process that involves clearing the "pollution" in your genes by revisiting key moments in past lives (of people who had your same name?!) and given the leitmotifs that crop up, I have an inkling that these visions are A.I.-crafted hallucinations, but the film's world-building is subtle enough to allow multiple interpretations. Seydoux's emotional purge is stymied by encounters with a man (George MacKay) who appears to be her soul mate, but also part of her doom in every timeline. Her feelings for him are what keep her from giving in entirely. The Beast says many things about mental health, especially as it relates to isolation and solitude - obviously produced in the wake of COVID - but while we can throw a metaphorical filter over it that speaks to a medicated state (the tamping down of emotions), it's also much more about A.I. psychosis - taking one's cues from chatbots, exploring their inhumanity dressed up as the ultimate objectivity and precision of thought, the fakeness of their helpfulness, and how they actually increase loneliness under the guise of addressing it. The other timelines are shades of all this: The turn-of-the-century story of a woman in a cold marriage, the contemporary adventures of a woman alone in a foreign country stalked by an incel, and the greenscreen elements that speak to an unreality which might be the key to understanding the A.I. manipulation... I've only really scratched the surface.
I was not the target demo for Patrick Willems's Night of the Coconut because I've never watched his channel, nor anyone's involved in the film (I recognized exactly one cameo, so take the review for what it is - a complete outsider coming into this "YouTube series finale" without any prior knowledge. I appreciate the ambition of its wild interdimensional story (out the same year as Everything, Everywhere... and like something from the same multiverse, in many ways), but I too often felt left out of the joke. And it IS very jokey, not only because of its pop culture references and meta comments, but because the acting is very "sketch comedy". Chloe Holgate has some chops (made me wish it was a FULL musical) and Matt Torpey is funny, but in general, there isn't a lot of acting ability, and even those two leads don't feel like real people (even though everyone is pretty much playing themselves). The satirical plot about an evil coconut robot trying to destroy the world after stealing everyone's online juice has some mojo, but so much happens that it feels interminable. Looks like it's a lot of fun for the participants and their fans, but I'm not steeped in YouTuber and Streamer culture enough to share in the joy. But any movie that uses Taylor Dane's song from The Shadow can't be all bad - that's MY kind of deep cut. Mileage will vary, probably based on your proximity to the original material.
An indie postapocalypse movie with shades of The Road, Astraea is about a pair of siblings crossing North America on foot to get to Nova Scotia where they still have relatives after 99.99% of the human population literally drops dead. In Maine - where this was shot, giving me big Atlantic Canada feels, thanks (I grew up just across the border so the landscapes were much the same) - they meet another pair of survivors who might alter their fate, or perhaps join it. A character piece where the survivors aren't necessarily at odds, and which works as a coming of age story for the teenage title character, who might well be the Last Girl on Earth, and what does that mean? Astraea, well-played by Nerea Duhart, is also plagued by visions that convince her that her Nova Scotian family is alive, though the older brother isn't necessarily a believer, kind of a stand-in for teenage unreasonableness, but even beyond the metaphor, I like this film a lot for showing just what it could be like to be the last people alive in a world that has gotten rid of most of us. A nice discovery.
Indy, the dog in Good Boy really photographs well. My, what a beautiful animal. And he needs to be because this is a haunted house story told through his perspective. He's always either in the shot, or we're seeing what he's seeing, with only a few connective establishing shots breaking the format. The movie is adverse to showing human faces that we're lucky the dialogue wasn't obscured as well. But they say animals can detect ghosts and other supernatural manifestations, and so Indy is well-positioned to defend his master in his grandfather's cursed old house, if not understand exactly what's going on. Thankfully, we've seen plenty of horror films to help US understand, but the canine POV bolsters the mystery of just what's happening to his master. If you've seen it all before and think it's a gimmick that won't actually refresh the genre, look into those soulful eyes and shut up.
Sometimes, what you need to get off the street and out of heroin addiction is a motivated social worker and a stray cat who imprints on you. A Street Cat Named Bob is a true story (thought I didn't realize that going in), about a down-on-his-luck busker who gets adopted by an adorable ginger cat, and I was like, that cat is really well behaved and well trained, only to find out that though he has stunt doubles, THAT IS REALLY BOB. A non-trained alley/shoulder cat who acts with Luke Treadaway like he did with the real James Bowen. Amazing animal, and a comfort to cat lovers in the audience, though there's always a certain tension because of the looming spectre of addiction and the dangers of street life. But it's essentially a sweet story, starring a very sweet cat, so it's not too harrowing for tender hearts. Treadaway has a nice voice, the songs written for the film are pleasant, and the cameo they give real Bowen is very well done, too. Was director Roger Spottiswoode chosen for this because he made Turner and Hooch, lo, these many years ago?
[1965] That Darn Cat!: Is this a better title than Undercover Cat (the book's?). D.C. (Darn Cat) is a Siamese chaos agent in an American suburb where half of everyone is British and can't hide it, adjoining streets where he comes across kidnappers (including Frank Gorshin auditioning for the Riddler) and their victim, holing up in an apartment. The lady gives him a message to carry - you have to be desperate to trust a cat to be your Lassie - and when discovered, the chase for the villains is on. Disney All-Star Dean Jones is the allergic agent on the case, while cutey-pie Hayley Mills (the cat's "owner" pushes for results. As the "owner" of an ill-tempered cat myself, I couldn't help but belly-laugh at the early scenes where they try to manhandle D.C., and marvel at how well trained the cats playing him were throughout. A frothy Disney affair, its more direct attempts at comedy are strictly 60s, with broad comic cameos and a LOT of objectionably nosy neighbors. They largely get their comeuppance, thankfully, though Hayley needs to drop that pipe-smoking surfer boy toot suite. The crime plot is just nasty enough (I believe the victim's fear) that the silliness is jarring next to it, but then this is about a cocky cat rumbling some criminals. An amusing old thing by the director of Mary Poppins.
[1966] Kill, Baby… Kill!: I was gonna say those Anglicized titles are the pits, but it seems like the original Italian title is "Operation Fear", which is even dumber. Oh well. Easily my least favorite Mario Bava to date, it feels more like it's part of the Hammer Horror oeuvre than the director's giallos. Victorian investigators sneaking through haunted Bavarian castles and dealing with terrified, superstitious villagers, you know the deal. That said, it IS Bava, so there are some beautifully inventive visuals, and anything with the ghost girl is quite cool, especially if she's not physically on screen (the bouncing ball, the swing perspective). Where it intersects with giallo is in its incredibly convoluted plot, all coming in at the end (so the pace is off), in infodumps that'll give you whiplash. But for all its atmospherics, the acting is either over-the-top or nearly absent - Giacomo Rossi Stuart as the coroner and leading man, in particular, has all the charisma of a block of wood - and that really drains it of interest.
Books: While Mark Haddon is adamant that he isn't an expert in neuro-diversity, and we therefore shouldn't put too much stock in the neuro-divergent perspective he uses in The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, I still think it works wonderfully. Christopher Boone is an empathetic portrayal of someone on the spectrum, and finds a way to explain (whether Haddon hit the mark scientifically or not) what is going on in his head as he tries to solve the murder of a neighborhood dog and, though he doesn't realize it, the mystery of just what's happening with the adults around him. Frequent asides expose his particular fixations - I think most readers, this one included, will skip or gloss over the maths - and provide a certain humor to the proceedings. As a piece of literature, Christopher's unique perspective also provides a deconstructionist narrative that is pleasant to fans of postmodernism, addressing just what is acceptable in storytelling, and mystery writing in particular. And despite what we might call the plain-spoken artifice of the book, it's still heading for an extremely touching finale. I'm not crying! YOU'RE crying! Or at least putting up a crying emoji.
French cartoonish Jean-Luc Deglin can draw cats, and that's perhaps all I care about when checking out cat humor graphic novels. That no matter how stylized and cartoony, the cats move like cats. So Rascal is a winner for me. (The French title is Crapule, which translates more as "scoundrel", it's harsher than "rascal", but tell you what, I've called my cat Crapule on more than one occasion, so Deglin knows what he's doing.) The story, such as it is, has a young woman inherit a cat and becoming a cat person not quite overnight, each page its own gag, but paced to show Rascal growing from kitten to young tomcat over the course of the book. Cute set-ups result in destructive (but earned) finishes, and sometimes going the opposite to show why we somehow keep forgiving our little terrors their seeming apathy and sudden betrayals. Rascal is a YOUNG cat, and those first years are indeed AWFUL, especially for the new cat owner. This is captured well, but also lovingly. Deglin's observations are strong, but he also delves into fantasy sequences as the human protagonist's dreams (and imagination) re: the cat become graphic reality. So there's invention, too. A nice gift for the cat lovers in your sphere.
RPGs: Played in David Gallaher's annual birthday bash FASERIP Marvel Super-Heroes RPG, essentially Squadron Supreme meets Days of Future Past, or because it's David, Days of the Deepest Possible Cuts, and not gonna lie, I was worried that I hadn't learned my lesson from last year's. When I had played Captain Carter last time (as a last-minute replacement), I found myself at the bottom of the power scale even in a group of Golden Age heroes. And here I had asked for Golden Archer when I knew Hyperion, Whizzer and Doctor Spectrum would be part of the group? But the GM's "I'll allow it" attitude was a blessing, and he gave me some pretty powerful arrows so that "Green Arrow" could fight side-by-side with other "Justice Leaguers". See best bits for more. I threw in a lot of cockney, but didn't attempt an accent. Anyway, David always puts a lot of effort in "coding" his Roll20 environment with special effects and unlockable content, so we're usually racing to look at everything AND complete the scenario in the few hours afforded us (eight gamers, not all in the same time zones, including one in the Philippines pulling an all-nighter... you don't want to go over TOO much). So we fought Sentinels, tracked the annual villain Arnim Zola to his lair, closed up the Negative Zone dimensional suck that was draining the local heroes of their life force, and subtly foregrounded the events of the Squadron Supreme maxi-series (in our personal futures, for the most part). A lot of nerdy references and laughs were had by all.
Best bits: In the first fight, the Whizzer disassembles a Sentinel in a single round and Doc Spectrum cut one's head off with energy scissors, so yeah, we quickly discovered who would win in a fight between the Justice League and the X-Men. Pff, not even on the same scale! Nuke being a Firestorm analog (played by Firestorm Fan Shag himself, also a call-back to
our Real Play episode of the Hero Points podcast) provoked the idea of Tom Thumb becoming a voice in Nuke's head, like a Professor Stein, and that added a lot of pathos, because the A.I. Tom was in love with wasn't just in the adventure, but died. Not that we're gonna tell Tom. Shush, Nighthawk, shush. Second Sentinel fight - I had shot one Sizechange arrow at a massive robot, making it football-sized, and an Acid arrow at another so it had a melting belly. Power Princess picks up the tiny one and throws him into the acid bath destroying both. Now THAT'S teamwork. Final fight - While everyone was pulling their weight, and Doc Spectrum made the ultimate sacrifice (against a brainwashed Starbrand) to save Nuke and redeem himself from what comics made him do in the maxi-series, I was as surprised as anyone that Golden Archer beat the Big Bad. Sure, Nuke turned Zola in Nimrod's body into a giant rubber ducky, BUT it was the Archer who shot Annihilus with three Shrink arrows, then the remaining "bug" with an Explosive arrow that exploded him down to the Microverse. Boom, Shakalaka! I mean, uhm, cor blimey!
With one player missing in this week's Torg Eternity game - we gave the Demon Slayer the excuse that he couldn't be trapped on a cruiseship during the upcoming full moon as he's also a werebat - I thought for sure the group would sail through a murder mystery on the high seas on a Cyberpapal "sin cruise" (believers are encouraged to indulge themselves so they have more sins to expiate once back on shore), but no, the Realm Runner's subplot wherein he's not happy with the inclusion of the new Apostate and bickers with him all the time ate up a LOT of the session. And now the Slayer will have to sit through the climax because we didn't get to it. He knows what he did. He was docked the appropriate amount of Piety Points. So this was essentially a character piece with no fighting (as yet, but the climax is a fight), just role-playing, investigation, and running around a big ship. Just what the doctor ordered after the action-heavy previous scenario. Before they set off, it was finally revealed to the team that the HQ they were using on (Danny the) Eternity Street was actually another's (which the players met in our side-game, lo, these last few months). No wonder if came furnished. Happily, there wasn't a fight over it and the owners let them use their conference room, just no more sleeping in our beds, okay?
Best bits: The bickering - The Super-Wrestler spent a half-hour lifting his finger to get a word in edgewise, which was funny, but also true of the GM, to be honest. Before that, he'd spent time in a pool and his body oil made rainbows in the water, and the parents were pretty angry they had to wipe down their kids. The Apostate hacking the local GodNet to keep tabs on the ship's security forces and sparking false alarms at the other end of the boat kept the PCs safe from getting thrown into the brig. The team had some nice plans for meeting and tricking the Inquisitor who had the piece of tech they needed to recover, but he was dead already (too bad). To get access to a medical chip reader, the Wrestler went in for his sunburn and let himself be sold on, not the "extreme ointment" (pun workshopped with our Apostate), but a full artificial skin graft (very painful since the doctor didn't actually numb the pain through a GodNet transmission because the Wrestler's disguise had a fake neural jack AND now he has living contradiction on his back - maybe that explains the three separate Reality Surges experienced during the final chase, 3 in 4 turns!). He did not, however, allow the Realm Runner to buy him a Cyber-Scripture tattoo for it. The Runner had a lot of fun with playing a pilgrim on a "sin tour", inventing a t-shirt with the 7 Deadly Sins on it, and using a marker to strike off each one (he's so asexual, we all doubted he'd get lust, but he's 4/7 with one scene to go). The Apostate reaching for an Everything bagel at the buffet made him lose 50 Piety points (who needs Everything when the GodNet is everything?), so he put it back and gave himself 50 lashes with prayer beads to restore his rating. Though tracking the assassin ultimately could default to four Stealth rolls, I let the players choose other skills to make it more lively, and we saw the Runner using his special Bunker Life skill to figure out where their prey was going in a closed environment, and the Wrestler use Maneuver to box the assassin in.
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