JLA Super-Telethon! Please Give to Our Generic Charity!

Justice League of America #114 (1974) has a super-villain (of sorts) and the return of Snapper Carr, etc., but the really interesting thing about "The Return of Anakronus" is that the JLA is holding a telethon! The first annual national super-thon! I wonder if they had a second. The story begins in the 16th hour of the broadcast, and "United Charities" is already getting 10.2 million dollars with 9 hours to go. So WHAT is this telethon like?
Well, to begin with, the JLA and friends (that's Kid-Flash there) are manning the phones. Don't worry, there are always members on patrol (though sometimes, it's just Elongated Man), and somehow, no big crimes are being committed. Everyone's apparently watching TV. Is it THAT entertaining? Let our hostess Black Canary tell us what's coming up next:
A tour of Atlantis? That would be awesome. Jim Cameron, eat your heart out. (It's 1974, maybe my reference should be to Jacques Cousteau.) It's not wall-to-wall superheroes though, unless Penwick's Playful Pachyderms is a book from the DC implosion I somehow missed. And Frank Sinatra too (he might have deserved a series at least as much as Bob Hope and Jerry Lewis).

So who would YOU like to answer the phone when you call in with your pledge?
Hm. Maybe not Green Arrow. I'm also wondering who's crank calling a charity event run by the world's greatest heroes. Are they hoping to get GA, Elongated Man or Red Tornado? I mean, who crank calls Batman?! Dude will find your house and pay you a visit!

Ok, back to the TV, what's next, Canary?
Oooh, three football teams against Superman? That's the kind of stuff I want to see!
Zatanna levitating families? Not quite so impressive, but still pretty good television. Who knows what else was on there? We only saw about an hour's worth, maybe two, just enough to collect an extra 450 000$.
So what MIGHT the JLA have put on the small screen? Batman introducing old episodes of his 60s TV series? Wonder Woman doing rodeo stunts? A political debate between Green Arrow and Hawkman? An empty stage (actually the Atom juggling grains of sand)? The full breadth of Hal Jordan's imagination (basic green shapes for the beginner Green Lantern)?

Time to call in with some requests!


David said...

Zatanna didn't levitate just any old family. She levitated the King family, which makes it only marginally more entertaining.

Siskoid said...

And I guess there are a lot of family members too!

LiamKav said...

I like how the Elongated Man is, er, elongating his arm to cut off GA's phone, when it looks like he could just do it by reaching over.

(Reed Richards is always doing that as well. Using his stretching powers when it just looks more awkward.)

Siskoid said...

This a guy who just plain ENJOYS his powers.

Also, makes it look interesting for viewers at home who look past the elephants to see what the heroes are doing in the background.


Blog Archive


5 Things to Like Activities Advice Alien Nation Aliens Say the Darndest Things Alpha Flight Amalgam Ambush Bug Animal Man anime Aquaman Archetypes Archie Heroes Arrowed Asterix Atom Avengers Awards Babylon 5 Batman Battle Shovel Battlestar Galactica Black Canary BnB 2-in1 Books Booster Gold Buffy Canada Captain America Captain Marvel Cat CCGs Charlton Circles of Hell Class Comics Comics Code Approved Conan Contest Cooking Crisis Daredevil Dating Kara Zor-El Dating Lois Lane Dating Lucy Lane Dating Princess Diana DCAU Deadman Dial H Dice Dinosaur Island Dinosaurs Director Profiles Doctor Who Doom Patrol Down the Rabbit Hole Dr. Strange Encyclopedia Fantastic Four Fashion Nightmares Fiasco Films Within Films Flash Flushpoint Foldees French Friday Night Fights Fun with Covers FW Team-Up Galleries Game design Gaming Geekly roundup Geeks Anonymous Geekwear Gimme That Star Trek Godzilla Golden Age Grant Morrison Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction Green Arrow Green Lantern Hawkman Hero Points Podcast Holidays House of Mystery Hulk Human Target Improv Inspiration Intersect Invasion Invasion Podcast Iron Man Jack Kirby Jimmy Olsen JLA JSA Judge Dredd K9 the Series Kirby Motivationals Krypto Kung Fu Learning to Fly Legion Letters pages Liveblog Lonely Hearts Podcast Lord of the Rings Machine Man Motivationals Man-Thing Marquee Masters of the Universe Memes Memorable Moments Metal Men Metamorpho Micronauts Millennium Mini-Comics Monday Morning Macking Movies Mr. Terrific Music Nelvana of the Northern Lights Nightmare Fuel Number Ones Obituaries oHOTmu OR NOT? Old52 One Panel Orville Outsiders Panels from Sheena Paper Dolls Play Podcast Polls Questionable Fridays Radio Rants Reaganocomics Recollected Red Bee Red Tornado Reign Retro-Comics Reviews Rom RPGs Sandman Sapphire & Steel Sarah Jane Adventures Saturday Morning Cartoons SBG for Girls Seasons of DWAITAS Secret Origins Podcast Secret Wars SF Shut Up Star Boy Silver Age Siskoid as Editor Siskoid's Mailbox Space 1999 Spectre Spider-Man Spring Cleaning ST non-fiction ST novels: DS9 ST novels: S.C.E. ST novels: The Shat ST novels: TNG ST novels: TOS Star Trek Streaky Suicide Squad Supergirl Superman Supershill Swamp Thing Tales from Earth-Prime Team Horrible Teen Titans That Franchise I Never Talk About The Prisoner The Thing Then and Now Theory Thor Thursdays of Two Worlds Time Capsule Timeslip Tintin Torchwood Tourist Traps of the Forgotten Realms Toys Turnarounds TV V Waking Life Warehouse 13 Websites What If? Who's This? Whoniverse-B Wikileaked Wonder Woman X-Files X-Men Zero Hour Strikes Zine